Step 1: Surveying
Survey the entire dira and memorize the floor plan. Locate as many exits as possible (Doors, windows, crawl spaces, ventilation shafts, etc.) In the event of an emergency, having only one or two escape routes planned may not suffice as it is statistically probable that your path will be blocked by any number or obstacles strewn haphazardly across the floor by you and your dira mates.
Step 2: Identify Hazards
You'r dira is full of things which could be potentially dangerous.
Depending on when your dira was constructed or last renovated, there may be hazards related to dilapidation.
Check to ensure that drywall and plastering on walls and ceilings is holding nicely. If the walls are starting to fall apart... move your bed to the other side of the room.
Next check to make sure the face plates on electrical sockets are attached firmly. In my dira they were not, and fell off. In the middle of the night while looking for something between my bed and the wall I electrocuted myself.
If your dira is in Eretz Yisroel (or in any third world country) it is entire possible that you have a toilet that looks something like this:
Check to ensure that the tank is attached firmly to the wall. I know someone personally who had a loose tank fall off of the wall and pin them down leaving them unable to get up, desperately shouting for help. That is not a situation you want to be in. Bochurim should never ever be seen needing help, and certainly not while on the toilet!
If you ever encounter a knob, lever, button, or switch and are unsure of what it does... don't press it!
That should be self explanatory but sometimes curiosity can get the best of a bochur with a head for iyun.
If you encounter any type of unidentifiable fixture in your dira, never stick your finger inside of it. What appeared to be a strange horn protruding from the wall (at first glance you assumed it to be some sort of alarm) was really a light fixture and now you have rachmana litzlan been electrocuted for the second time in one week!
Look out for Bio-hazards. Yeah it seems really cool that this dira came with a fridge but who knows what has been left inside there and for how long. Approach with severe caution. Don a gas mask or some other type of respiratory/olfactory protection. Open all of the windows. If there are other bochurim in your dira I highly suggest trying to get someone else to be the one who looks inside for a peek. If what you see inside is traumatic and unmentionable slam the door shut immediately. Get someone to remove this fridge from the dira and then never speak of it again. If bugs fly out... RUN!!!!!!!
Other hazards may include things such as magazines (Sports Illustrated, Time, ESPN), novels (most likely Tom Clancy, John Grisham, or Oliver North), and movies (only the ones you have already seen before of course, because you definitely don't watch any new ones.)
3. To and From Your Dira
Lastly, always make sure you have a safe way to get between your dira and the zal or wherever else you may go. Depending on the time of day or night certain streets may not be safe to travel on. Late at night try to take well lit main streets as much as possible. If you are going somewhere you are not meant to be going you are going to need to weigh the dangers. Would you rather be safe but seen in public going where you shouldn't or should you risk bodily harm but avoid the ever watchful eye of rebbeim/friends/yungerleit/other spies.
Shluff and Shteig Safely!
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