extended AFK

The bochur who ran the wireless network in my place of residence got hitched and moved out.

I have decided not to subscribe myself to the internet and therefore my internet access is very limited.

I intend to continue writing posts and then just posting them when i get access at YYKs.

It feels great when...

You put on a pair of pants one Friday and you can just barely squeeze into them, but the next Friday you can barely keep them unless you wear a belt.

Antisemitism in Crown Heights

Three times. Three times in five days.

Instance 1:

I am walking home from Shabbos lunch. As i walk past a goy he starts muttering under his breath. He articulates, "If yall think what Hitler did to yall was bad, wait till you see what I will do."

Well, the first thing I did was go to the police and file a complaint as a result of your threat against the public. The officers of the 71st police precinct were quite accommodating. They knew that for me its Shabbos so they would have to do all the writing but they happily filled out all the paperwork. The second in command at the precinct asked to speak to me. We talked about what happened. He is a big fan of The Rebbe. He assured me this would be taken seriously. Since the police didn't hear your verbal threat they can't straight up arrest you. However, he assured me that if they find you they are going to make things difficult for you, and run you for warrants.

Instance 2:

I go into the bodega by troy and lincoln. As I walk down the street a Rastafarian type man greets me. I stop and begin to chat with him. About 10 yards away there are three or four other shvartzes leaning against a car. They see this man talking to me. One shouts out, "Yo brother... why are you talking to that [expletive] Jew???" He responds, "Chill, he's cool." Not good enough. "No, he's a [expletive] Jew." We both walk towards them. One of them says "Hitler should have finished yall off."

Instance 3:

Two co-workers and I are walking home from work. A young shvartz on a bicycle rides by. He slows down, looks back at us, grins, and exclaims, "HIIITTTLLERRRRRRRR." Can you really be so stupid. I didn't want to start a fight in this neck of the woods but its almost as if this kid did not understand that had his people lived in Europe then they would have been in the same boat.

aschalta d'geulah

3rd Tammuz, 5687

not

5th Iyar, 5708

;-)

No Streimlach or Spodiks in Lubavitch

Since we don't know how to take care of hats.

Musical memories, watery eyes, and how we cope

It is past 3 AM and I am still up.

No particular reason.

Just forgot to go to sleep.

I log onto facebook and notice I got a message.

Further investigation shows that the message is actually a personal one, and not spam from some group or event.

A former roommate of mine made a good quality recording of a song and he wants me to have a listen.

I hit play.

The words start and I am hit by a tidal wave of memories.

He wrote this song with... Dovid.

It has been three months since Dovid passed away.

I can see and hear Dovid playing guitar and singing.

His infectious joy making everyone smile.

We are laughing and horsing around.

Its late at night but this is the room that never sleeps.

Everyone has a beer and sings along.

My eyes get watery with tears which I hold back.

I don't know why I don't let myself cry.

I go to Dovid's facebook wall.

His friends still post on it sometimes.

My roommate posted a link to the song.

Someone told you about how they got a job teaching martial arts.

Someone told you about how life in general is going.

Someone wrote  about how they can't wait until the next time yall get to jam together.

Everyone wrote "we miss you."

I haven't really dealt with your passing because I was so scared and so torn up that I drowned out those thoughts and feelings. I couldn't deal with the idea that I won't be seeing you anymore. That we aren't going to get slushies at 711, or driving to some "haunted road" that we read about on the internet. We aren't hanging out anymore.
So I look at things like your on vacation. Pretty soon you'll come back, and we'll all hang out in eretz yisroel together. 

Beer in Bobov, Lokshen in Lelov

Coors. Lots and lots of forty ounce bottles. Barely touched.
What a waste. Silly Bobovers.


Dropped into the Lelover Rebbe's tish too. Went with a friend. The shirayim soup was making its way to our end of the table. I could see the troubled look on my friend's face. It got to him. He tried to play the trump card of all not-sharing-food excuses.


"I have strep"


"so what?"


"so I really shouldn't eat shirayim with this spoon or else the next person will get sick"


"So take with your hands!"


"I can't"


"Yes you can!"


People were looking.
I am sure that the Lelovers understood what was going on.
Bested, he took.

The Dangers of Disney

I have often thought about how the Disney movies I watched as a kid actually contained terrible messages, and how many people I grew up with had incredibly dramatic adolescent years as a result of having been instilled with the wrong attitudes and expectations.
I have thought about writing on this topic before but another blogger has beat me to the punch.
Without further ado, Mushka in Wonderland via Candy Hearts.

Breaking up is hard to do...

Everyone knows breaking up with chavrusas is hard.
So hard that Aryeh Kunstler wrote "The Chavrusa Break Up Song"
I have a terrible track record with chavrusas.
We were always either such good friends that we joked around the whole time, or didn't get along at all and I resented them so much that I hated learning, or one of us wasn't serious enough and we didn't show up all the time, or for all of seder. Maybe one day I will find someone who I can just sit down with and learn. Someone who want's to break their head over a sugya, learn slowly b'iyun rav, and is still pleasurable to chat with in small doses for breaks.

Here are some break up lines you can try using.
Special thanks to anyone who saw this list before I posted it, and made suggestions or gave me input.
You know who you are.

1. I love learning with you, but I'm not in love with learning with you.
2. I like Rashi, and you like Tosfos. It's never going to work.
3. I think we should learn with other people
5. I think you should come to my apartment and get your pens, notebooks, and sefarim...
6. I met this guy in the coffee room...
7. We're on completely different dafim.
8. I'm just going to get a kovetz. I'll be right back.
9. I need more space. I'm moving to the other side of zal and I don't do long distance.
10. My mashpia says you're holding me back.
11. Your chiddushim are great, they just aren't like my Tatty used to make them.
12. You're more interested in Tosfos than you are in me.
13. Your all shakla and no tarya
14. About your derech halimud... I don't swing that way.
15. I'm sorry but you just dont have enough meforshim in the back of your Gemara.

The olam is invited to critique, comment, and share their own.